No, I did not plan my posts this way. It was completely by chance that this happened.
Its been exactly nine months since I started Blended Beauty and it just so turns out that this is my 250th post. Its ironic, I know. And while I normally hate irony…I got a little choked up this morning when I realized how this played out. When I started blogging, I doubted I could do just one post a week…much less 250 posts since May 27.
I won’t lie…this journey called blogging has been really scary at times. I remember when I first started, I was scared I would never get a sponsor. I was scared everyone would think what I was writing was boring. I sat there, watching these other amazing bloggers post their pictures and wondered if I would ever have the opportunity to work with any of them or if could ever dream of being able to take pictures as beautiful as so many I watched on Facebook for so long.
And in case some of you need a really good laugh, there are several of you whom I have developed great friendships with who, when I started blogging, I was scared to death of. I have shared with several of you that initially, y’all scared the hell out of me! Now…pfffttt!!! We are gonna get real and talk about it like it is if we need to. LOL
Despite those early fears, my scariest moment in blogging came in mid September. I was struggling with the decision to disclose the fact I am transitioning. I knew I could continue blogging no matter what happened then, but I was still horribly afraid. I was afraid how all of you would react. I was scared of losing sponsors. I was scared of losing the support I had gained from all of you, my peers, sponsors and readers. If it hadn’t been for Adalynne, Ryanna and Melly…I can’t thank you three enough for listening and supporting me then…I don’t know what I would have done without you ladies. That was an incredibly difficult decision to make. I was so close to deleting that draft, even after I told Addy, Ry and Melly I was going to post it.
But I didn’t delete it. And what I found through that post was a level of support I never imagined in my life. Second Life residents I had never met were so kind to me. My fellow bloggers, many of whom had no clue about the real me, opened their hearts to me and gave me a level of support I never dreamed possible. My sponsors never flinched. What some of you may not know is I cried for days over the support I received from all of you. On days when I’m struggling in real life, I will go back to that post and read all of the unbelievably kind and loving comments you left me and the private messages I received as a result of that post. During those down times, your words from September help sustain me.
And what most of you may not know is that the love and support you gave me then is one of my best memories of my 13 years in Second Life.
I don’t know if most of you understand the positive impact you have had on my life through your comments on my pictures and what I share in my posts. As I have shared my real life story, you all have celebrated my victories with me and supported me during the difficult times. There are those of you who even reach out and check on me when it seems I’m struggling because of what I share in my posts.
The best example I can think of with this is Rina and Aleriah. Having become two of my best friends, Rina and Aleriah reached out to me one day and just asked what was bothering me. Now, keep in mind they have never heard my voice. But with the friendship we have developed, they were able to see I was struggling…not so much in what I wrote and shared, but how I wrote it and shared it. I hope each of you has had a moment like that with someone in SL…where you realized your friendship with someone was THAT real and true. That’s something special. That’s a gift I would have never had if I hadn’t taken the chance to start this blog.
And last night was a perfect example of one of those incredibly special (and emotional) moments for me. Being able to share these amazing SL creations with you is something I see as an honor and privilege. I have felt that way since my first blog post. Last night, a creator I had blogged a dress for shared a message with me that literally left me crying as I went to sleep. Its one of those messages that will go into my memory to pull out on the days I’m struggling. Of course, as I am crying over the message, I have friends like Amelia giving me such a hard time that I can’t help but laugh the whole time too.
There are so many others I could thank by name as I close this post out. I hope none of you think I have forgotten about you by not mentioning you by name. That’s not the case at all. So many of you have a special place in my heart for being the amazing people you are and all the support you have given me. If you ever doubt that, message me. I will be more than happy to share with you how you have positively impacted my life.
Being able to blog as I do, to be able to be me here, is such a gift. To be able to share these amazing creations with each of you is such an honor. Thank you, creators, blogger managers, fellow bloggers and followers, for not only allowing me to be me, but for encouraging me to be me and supporting me each step of the way. You all have given me so much and I can never repay you for that.
Having brought tears to my own eyes, I will end simply with… Here’s to the next nine months and 250 posts.
See it on Flickr.
What I’m Wearing
Addams – Yvonne Long Sleeves Tied Shirt & Winter Leather Coat
Blueberry – Pia Socks & Denim Shorts
*elise* – Erika Maitreya Bento Rings
Nutmeg & Entwined – Cameron
Swallow – Padlock Friendship Necklace
Foxcity – Carefree 3m
Beech forest autumn
Delilah ~ Spaniel Resting
Mooring deck (big)