Patience is not one of my greater virtues. But I am getting better at it.
And for once, my patience paid off.
Like every blogger, we all have our dream stores and events that we want to blog for. I have been incredibly fortunate. I have made a few of those bucket list teams and sometimes, I still have to pinch myself to remind myself I am not dreaming. I have been fortunate though. I mean, I have worked hard but I have also been fortunate to have had amazing support and mentors who have helped me grow far quicker than I ever hoped for or expected.
This past week, I achieved another team I have dreamed of blogging for since I started. I made the team for the July round of FaMESHed X. I can’t say specifically why X has been such a big goal for me. I mean, obviously there are some AMAZING designers who take part in it. But for me, it was something more that had me set my sights on this event. I believe it was something very personal.
As I wrote about in my post yesterday, its can be hard for people on this journey to be seen by others as more than certain body parts and labels. Its not uncommon for people I meet to get stuck on questions like, “How does she use the bathroom?” or, “How does she have sex?” I mean, I get it that there are all sorts of questions about living life as a transgender individual. But also, as I wrote yesterday, there is so much more to me.
For me, making the FaMESHed X blogging team is a chance to show a side of myself that many will never be able to comprehend. So many get hung up on certain aspects of my journey and body that they could not envision me as a sultry, sensual and/or sexual woman. Obviously, even fewer will be able to personally experience that side of me…which is a good thing. But blogging for X is an opportunity to let a side of myself out on the camera that many may not even believe exists. Its the opportunity to say, “Hey! Everyone! In my heart, I really am not that different from most of the women you will meet.”
This opportunity is also about more than just me. Its about every transitioning individual who few can see as the sensual, seductive and sexual trans man or trans woman they are. Its the chance to say that all of us…trans, intersexed, cis, whatever…will not have our sexuality defined by assumptions or physical aspects of ourselves. We are, in the end, loving, caring and yes…sexual…beings.
So yeah…making this team carried significant symbolic meaning for me.
As I said earlier, I have never been known for my patience. But I was patient for this. I applied, got reject and went back to working on my pictures to grow and learn more. Then I applied, got rejected again and picked up new skills. I can’t remember how many times I was denied a spot on this team before making it. At least three times. But I worked and waited and finally got my opportunity. There is a lesson there for all of the bloggers who grow frustrated when you don’t make a team. Don’t give up. Keep working. Keep growing. Pick the brains of people you trust for new techniques. And try, try again.
The slave girl who dutifully waits up for her Mistress, even if she happens to fall asleep, is often rewarded for being so patient and true to her heart and owner. In the same way, we all need to be true to our dreams. Be patient. Keep working. Show the world you are going to keep working to achieve your dreams. Show them you are a unique and special person who cannot be duplicated.
Show them that the only thing that can stop you from being you is yourself.
See it on Flickr.
Foxcity – Budget Flyer 4m
Foxcity – Cold Outside 1m
Brass Stud Chair -Adult
Tall Brass Side Table
pilea peper plant
pink medinilla plant